School countdown/Radio Autism Battle

In 10 days my kids will be heading back to school. Yes, I am counting down the days on my trusty calendar. While the thought of some quiet in this house is appealing, I have to say the anxiety is creeping in.
I am not so worried about Taylor. She is a Junior this year and she has everything pretty much under control. This week is band camp with thirteen hour days, she is in heaven. She got her class schedule yesterday and she is happy with it. Her job is going well. She has a new boyfriend which is a blessing, even though they are on my bad side right now. This should be a good year for her.
Sarah is excited to get back to school and her friends. She is a great student and loves to learn, the only thing about her is she is a chatterbox. Maybe she can keep her social butterfly personality confined to recess this year. Ok, I really don't think that is going to happen at all. She is a Second grader this year and I think she will have a great year as well.
My anxiety is for Daniel. He is a Fifth grader this year and even though we have been dealing with the diabetes for several school years, it still feels like starting over each year. Then there is all the stuff that comes along with the Asperger's. His IEP should still be in place to start the year and he will continue with the Speech Therapy and the Occupational Therapist will still be helping us. I need to update his 504 for the diabetes part and try to get it signed this year. We need to schedule a time before school starts for him to go in and see his new classroom and get a feel for how his days will be set up. I know it will all fall into place but for some reason I still get nervous at the start of a new school year.
He has done so well this summer but of course his days were wrapped around his own schedule for the most part. Soon that will change and he will have less control and it will all start up again. He doesn't go to his Endo appointment until the 6th so I am sure I need to get orders faxed before then. We need to get all of his picture schedules updated and try to start some sort of routine now so he will be ready when school does start. We will get there, it will be a great year.

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On another note: There has been quite a craze going on about the radio personality Michael Savage. Parents of Autistic children everywhere are up in arms and in a fit to get him fired for his recent comments about Autism. My view on this is that I can see both sides. Do I want him fired? No. Do I think he has a right to his opinion? Yes. Do I think his opinion is right? Yes and I think that it was misunderstood in a sense. Do I understand why the parents are upset? Yes, I do.
It is difficult when you are as emotionally invested in an issue as parents are with things like ASD. When someone makes a statement saying anything that hints your child's issues are not a medical condition but instead a discipline issue, it hits a lot of nerves. All of the conditions on the spectrum of Autism are hard to wrap your brain around. If your child has a tumor, you can see it. If your child has a broken arm, you can see it. If your child has had their feelings hurt, you can understand it. If your child is scared of the dark, you can relate to that fear. But when your child's brain is wired in a very different way, it is hard to grasp because we can't relate. When you can't relate it opens up the floodgates to second guessing yourself and the insecurities of your parenting skills. That is all above and beyond the amount of drain on your emotions and physical being when dealing with a child on the spectrum. Oh and not to mention the financial and family issues that also come into play.
Mr. Savage is clearly concerned that the medical community has an agenda with the number of people, kids and adults alike, that are being diagnosed with Autism. If we are honest here, we know this sort of thing happens all the time and it is usually dollar influenced. He is also concerned with the amount of drugs and the age at which they are being prescribed for these kids. We should all be concerned with this one. Mr. Savage is also concerned about how the number of people diagnosed with Autism affects those on the lower end of the spectrum. This too is a valid point. The desensitization that occurs when so many issues are lumped into one illness family can do more damage than good. It starts out with the idea that the more people in one pool, the more attention and funding it will draw. As we have seen with diabetes, it often times just brings about a battle of which illness is more important or the question of "well, aren't they all the same disease?", which is not beneficial for anyone.
My son has Asperger's Syndrome. Do I think this is a real condition? Yes, I live with this child and can tell you that it is very real. He has essentially been diagnosed twice by two different teams of medical professionals that specialize in psychiatry and Autism. Do I think he needs to be medicated? As with anything else, Asperger's can be unique to the individual. At this time and with the combination of symptoms that Daniel has, it is not my opinion that he needs meds. What he needs is lots of help and attention to learn or relearn things that come naturally to others. He needs Behavioral Therapy to learn alternatives to some of his behaviors. He needs Speech Therapy to teach him the intricacies of language and social situations. He needs Occupational Therapy to both help him with easier ways to handle tasks and to help him build the weaker motor skills that come along with this condition. He needs me to be a patient and loving parent and his family to be there to support him when he hits a road block or to understand that it is not only ok but fabulous that he has a different approach to life than we do.
As a parent of a child on the spectrum, it does bother me when people pick out one or two things that Daniel does and say "He is fine, most kids go through similar phases." or, "He just needs more discipline and he would be fine." Yes, I know a lot of kids throw a tantrum now and again. If you think a child with ASD throws "normal" tantrums, then you my friend have never witnessed a "true" meltdown. Yes, I know that kids have fears of the dark or of the boogie man. The fears that ASD kids have are more intense, sometimes do not make sense, and can be debilitating. Some kids don't like to eat certain foods and can be picky eaters. Kids with ASD can have extra sensitive senses which cause certain tastes, textures, lights, sounds or smells to make them physically ill or agitated. My point is that when kids are on the upper end of the spectrum and at first glance seem to be like any other kid, doesn't mean they are. When kids are on the lower end of the spectrum and can not carry on a relationship with you in the way most kids would, does not mean that they are ignorant or have nothing to say to the world.
Every child is unique, a special gift to this world. Every child has wonderful talents and incredible views to enhance our lives. It is our job to protect them, nurture them and meet their needs so they can grow into the person they are meant to be. This does not mean that we get to choose who they are to become, that is already decided for the most part. No child is born with the ability to raise themselves. Some children come with extra challenges, maybe it is a chronic illness, maybe it is a mental condition or maybe it is in the form of a gifted talent. However these children are gifted to us, it is our responsibility to step up and guide them, no matter how tough that can get. It is never ok to blindly medicate children so that our lives are easier. (I have seen this happen) It is never ok to manipulate a diagnosis in order to use our children to gain something. (This happens more often than you would think) And it is never ok for the medical or pharmaceutical companies to use our children as bait to attract the cash cow.
So, if you know a family dealing with a diagnosis of ASD please support them. It may not always be clear to you from the outside what is really happening but trust me it is challenging. If you are a family facing the diagnosis of ASD, don't be afraid of a second opinion. For everyone who has a child or loves a child, question all medications for necessity and safety. Do your research before you trust someone just because they where a white lab coat. If these people really do have the child's best interest and welfare at heart, they won't mind the questions. These are our children and we must protect them and give them every opportunity for the best life possible. In my opinion this is what both sides really want in the battle between ASD parents and Mr. Savage. Support for those that need it, protection for all, and for those trying to do harm, of any kind, to be brought to justice.